Saturday, September 30, 2017

This Week In Trumpland September 30, 2017

THIS WEEK IN TRUMPLAND, a sixty second primer on the path to Armageddon: “water, big water, ocean water” edition

As Puerto Rico struggles with no drinking water or electricity, and with San Juan Mayor Carmen Yulin Cruz begging for the supplies and help which have not come, Trump gives himself high marks in his dealing with the crisis and then defends slow response saying “Puerto Rico is an island surrounded by water, big water, ocean water”
After Cruz says in a press conference that “we are dying here” Trump unleashes, and then deletes, a twitter storm insulting her
Trump goes on a racist warpath against NFL and NBA athletes
Jared Kushner, Ivanka, Stephen Miller, Gary Cohn and other white house officials  revealed to have used private emails to conduct White House business
Trump unveils a new, even more draconian travel ban
Claiming that his new tax plan would be bad for him and good for the middle class, Trump proposes a plan that would in fact cut his personal taxes by more than 50%
Ultra conservative candidate Roy Moore, who was twice thrown off the Alabama Supreme Court for judicial overreaching, wins the Republican primary for U.S. Senate
Trump reacts by deleting his tweets endorsing losing candidate Luther Strange
In a move that will fortify Trump and scare everyone else, Twitter doubles its capacity from 140 characters to 280 characters
NYT reveals that Donald Trump, Jr. ditched his secret service detail to go moose hunting in the Yukon
Health and Human Services Secretary Tom Price walks the plank, probably asking for a private plane to fly him home
Hugh Hefner goes to the big Playboy mansion in the sky

Saturday, September 23, 2017

This week in Trumpland September 23, 2017

THIS WEEK IN TRUMPLAND, a sixty second primer on the path to Armageddon: “my head is spinning” edition

On the day of his first Presidential address at the U.N. Trump instead uses Twitter to throw shade on the Emmys
During his speech at the U.N. Trump makes multiple references to “Nambia”, conjoining the names of Namibia and Zambia
As part of his U.N. address Trump threatens to “totally destroy” North Korea, calling Kim Jong Un “Rocket Man on a suicide mission”
Kim responds by calling Trump “a frightened dog” and a “mentally deranged dotard”
The rest of the world calls both Trump and Kim just plain nuts
Sounding very much like a new name for an even broader Muslim ban, White House says it will replace ban with targeted travel restrictions geared to certain countries
Republican Senator and physician Bill Cassidy lies about the contents of his proposed health care bill, and is called on it by non-physician Jimmy Kimmel
John McCain signals that he will again vote “no” on new Draconian health care bill heading to Senate floor
With Melania Trump standing right next to him during a rally in Ft Myers, Trump apologizes that “Melania really wanted to be with us”
When stager 4 cancer patient Laura Packard tweets at Trump for trying to take away the health care that could save her life, Trump blocks her from his Twitter account
In a blow to victims of campus sexual assault cases, Department of Education raises standard of proof set during the Obama years
Trump administration signals it might be willing to stay in the Paris accords “under the right conditions”
Trump deals with another important global issue by disinviting NBA star Steph Curry to the White House 
Seeking privacy, Donald Trump, Jr. decides to forgo secret service protection

Saturday, September 16, 2017

This Week in Trumpland September 16, 2017

THIS WEEK IN TRUMPLAND, a sixty second primer on the path to Armageddon: “your move” edition

Travel ban ping pong continues as Supreme Court reverses appellate court restrictions on who can be barred under the ban
Supreme Court also knocks down a lower court ruling that Texas congressional redistricting was unconstitutionally the product of racial discrimination
Justice Department declines to prosecute Baltimore officers responsible for the death of Freddie Gray
Congress passes non-binding bipartisan measure urging Trump to denounce hate groups
Twenty-Eight year old former model and Trump confidante Hope Hicks is named White House Communications Director
Republican Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell publicly questions whether Trump can "salvage his administration"
Democratic leadership announces a deal with Trump to protect DACA immigrants while strengthening border security
WH Press Secretary Sara Huckabee Sanders says Trump “has done more for bipartisanship in eight days than Obama did in eight years”
Acting every bit the candidate, Hillary Clinton says she’s “done with being a candidate”
Ted Cruz blames his staff (pun intended?) for interacting with a twitter porn account